(Image courtesy of Rachel Held Evans, and her Week of Mutuality series).
One of the topics that will be discussed this week is sets of misconceptions about egalitarians. Egalitarians are those people defined as: "Christians who identify as egalitarian usually believe that Christian women enjoy equal status and responsibility with men in the home, church, and society, and that teaching and leading God’s people should be based on giftedness rather than gender." (RHE, 2012)
Now, even Rachel makes the disclaimer that she doesn't agree with every point outlined from groups such as CBE (Christians for Biblical Equality), so right there we can see, as with most things in life, there are varying shades of who we are and what we adhere to.
My post today is about that very thing.
Slut.
Not exactly the most flattering term to refer to a woman.
Here's some context: a high ranking police officer in Toronto made some crude remarks about female sexual assault victims. The response...
Click here for more information on SlutWalk Toronto, and the ensuing global SlutWalks.
Internalized racism is that form of insidious racism where the oppressed group begins to believe the lies of the oppressing group. I believe the same to be true for sexism. When women believe the lies we have been told, even flaunt them, to try and redeem our status we do ourselves no favours. This is not a form of egalitarianism I endorse. It demeans men, leaving them with little room for a healthy response to women - home, church and society. It demeans women, still leaving a bad taste in everyone's mouths about who we really are. It demeans the Church, when women demand that "if we've got it, flaunt it!" and refer to one another as sluts. Sorry... but no matter how you angle it: 1+1 does not = 5. It's a term as bad as "n*gg*r".
Make no mistake about it however: men, especially male church leadership, demanding women dress a certain way, do their hair a certain way, or define modesty as THE PINNACLE of expressing submission to men is a form of complementarianism I struggle with too. As with most issues, there are varying degrees and shades here. Not every complementarian would dare set up his wife's closet! However, pastors entering the ER to be with female victims of sexual assault must stop making such comments as: "You dressed like THAT? No wonder he raped you!"
So when church leaders declare women to be the cause of their sexual assaults because of outward clothing, women have the responsibility to have a large outcry! That is wrong in every sense of the circumstance. The word 'modesty' has been a battlecry of patriarchy for ages... "Don't dress in any way to turn us on! We'll want to have sex with every single one of you!"
Men are far more than the sex machines church and culture would make them out to be (sorry guys; you are more than your penises).
So as much as I Will Not Receive The Word "Slut", I do understand and empathize with the rationale behind it. When church leaders declare a women's wardrobe to be the cause of a man's cognizant actions of violence, they are spreading deception and destroying both the women and the man's humanity.
Egalitarianism needs to humbly love and support both males and females.
Males need to move away from blaming women for their hard-ons ("She came on to me!)...
Women need to move away from desiring to be 'sluts' (using the word because of SlutWalk), and who God created them to be...
The church needs to better grasp the impact of its words and actions by blaming women for little things that do not cause rape. Men choose to rape; not a wardrobe. We need to create a place where both boys and girls are raised in a culture of love and mutual respect, and can express that respect intelligently and sincerely.
We are servants together.
